Wednesday

me: on a scale of 1-10
how retarded do you think the kids will be?

R: some are totally retard
some not so bad

me: B: tell me tell me!!!
is the custodian retarded too?

R: well....he is a custodian.....

me: the first thing that comes up when you google retarded in the suggestions is....
"retarded policeman"
"retarded ejaculation"
"retarded in love"

R: mongoloid baby

me: "retards are funny"
"retards are strong"
"retards are us"
and the best
"i live with a retard retards are so stupid"
"why are michael jackson's kids white"
"why are all the black kids sitting together in the cafeteria"
"why are there school"
"why are you interested in this job at boston market"
"can i get pregnant on my period"
"can i get a witness"
"can i get unemployment if i quit"

R: "asians doing christopher walken"

me: "christopher walken googly eyes"
"can people read minds"
"can people get fleas"
"can cats see ghosts"
"can cats eat dog food"
"can dogs get high"

R: "who cares about disabled people"
"who cares about michael jackson"
"who cares about old people"

me: "who cares if christ has risen"
Sent at 4:47 PM on Wednesday

me: "when will the recession end"
"how do women make love to women"
"how do animals survive in the desert"

R: "my mom is a fob"
"my mom is on facebook"
"my mom is pregnant"
"my mom is an alcoholic"
me: "my daddy ate my eyes"
"my girlfriend has no friends"
"dinosaurs aren't extinct they're just hiding"
"my grandma can do better than me"
why does my eye twitch
why does my vag smell
why does my dog eat poop
why does my cat lick me
Sent at 4:53 PM on Wednesday

me: madonna is old
madonna is dead
madonna is an idiot
madonna is gross
madonna is a skank
madonna is scary
madonna is a muslim now
Sent at 4:54 PM on Wednesday

R: chinese people eat babies
chinese people are so funny this is the way they count their money
chinese people are aliens

me: are gay people born that way
are gay people allowed in the military
are gay people going to hell
are gay people attracted to themselves
are gay people normal

R: why do chinese people do nails
japanese people don't have souls

me: are girls supposed to shave down there

R: is my brother dumber than a hamster

me: are fat people warmer than skinny people

R: my poop is too big to come out

me: are fairies real

R: fat children took my life
homosexuals can't whistle
homosexuals can't swim they attract enemy radar
nerds are hot barbie

me: can fat people be anorexic

R: obese women hairstles
obese women giving birth

me: can ugly guys get girls
skinny girls don't eat salad

R: fat men in skirts
fat men in speedos

me: skinny girls vs fat girls

R: fat men from space
can fat people wear skinny jeans
can fat people skateboard

me: babies that look real
babies that don't crawl
babies that look old

R: dead animals in walls
dead animals need love too

me: babies that don't blink
mothers that kill their children

R: dead cats bouncing
dead cats in miami
Sent at 5:04 PM on Wednesday

me: mom can't see me
new mom can't cook
Sent at 5:05 PM on Wednesday

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